Thursday, February 17, 2011

Why is it Difficult to Admit that You are Wrong?

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Most people don't want to admit when they make mistake. What are the common response when confronted? Instead of simply saying, "My apology", "My mistake", "I was wrong",  "You are right", "I'm sorry"..
(1) They lie
(2) They make excuses
(3) They are defensive
(4) They strike back
(5) They criticize others
(6) They blame others

What else will you add in the list? It is hard to admit when you are wrong because of pride, ego, reputation, self-image, self-respect. It hurts your pride when you admit you are wrong. It threatens your reputation. Yet, admitting your mistake sets you free from the prison of pride. 

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

How to Win an Argument

One of the greatest lessons I've learned lately in the area of relationship is humility. Lots of conflicts, misunderstandings, and relational breakdown will be solved almost instantly by an attitude of humility. Humility is a difficult word to accept sometimes because it is understood as timidity and lack of self-confidence. Humility appears as though you are always the loser or always at the bottom, like a rose, being trampled on the ground. People don't want to be losers because it hurts their ego, self-esteem, and pride. They want to win!

Often, we sacrifice friendship and relationship at the altar of being right. Lots of things can be resolve by not defending ourselves even when we are right. Broken relationship is fixed easily if we just let others win! When you let others win, it makes you a winner not a loser because you just won a friend. If you win an argument, you lose a friend and this makes you a loser. If you want to win, let others win!
  • Be courageous to say "I'm sorry", "My mistake" or "You are right." When you do, do it heartily, without making excuses.
  • Be courageous to apologize when you are wrong. And when you do, don't defend yourselves.
  • Be courageous to let others win!
  • Don't remind someone else past mistake.
  • Forgive and move on! 
It takes an attitude of humility to do these things, and to consider others better than ourselves. Being humble makes you a winner-you can win argument every time.

Don't Give Satan Credit

I find it disturbing when Christians give Satan credit he doesn't deserve. If all believers blame Satan, it makes him omnipresence. I think it amuses the devil when we give him all the credit for all the problems even if the problem is clearly our own fault. It is true that Satan is the archenemy of believers. He is the tempter, the father of lies and like a roaring lion seeking whom he may devour. Yet, let us also remember that temptation also comes from the inside. You won't be tempted if there's nothing inside of you saying "I want that thing".

When believers are in trouble or in a mess, they say, "The devil made me do it"!  or "Satan made you do that." "Satan is destroying the the unity of the believers". 

Some start to wage war with Satan when the war is within themselves. Parents blame Satan for wayward children when perhaps it simply the result of their own way of discipline. 

It is important that we should stop passing the blame on the devil for all the messes we've been, and start looking within ourselves, taking the responsibility, and taking the necessary action. 

The reality of spiritual warfare is undeniable but so is the existence of the self within. The ego and the pride doesn't come from the devil himself, but originated from within.